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SpinDistribute.com Article Directory

The following article was published in our article directory on June 6, 2017.
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"I Couldn't Imagine A Sober Life, I Really Felt Like A Devil"

Article Category: Entertainment

Author Name: Andrew Mullen

It was broken in two places. I don't remember how I broke it so badly. I didn't have the strength to crawl from the bathroom floor into the shower to wash away the filth of consuming nothing but vodka for a week. I was physically and mentally broken. My damaged leg would take about 6 months to repair, but my mind would take a lot longer.

This was a couple of years ago now. It wasn't my last bender, but it was a blessing in disguise. I'm not saying this to fish for sympathy or glorify a bad situation, but I do want you to know that part of my ongoing recovery from addiction, was to recover my songwriting passion.

My name is Andrew Mullen and under the guise of "Mullen", I have just released a single called "The Devil Is Innocent". It is the first single off my upcoming album called "Intox" which is slated for a mid-2017 release. When I started writing songs that would become the album, I wanted to write music that I would be proud of. These songs needed to mean something deep to me, in a style that I was passionate about (Alternative Rock Music) and about subjects which have a social impact that people could relate to. The word 'Intox' is a double edged word to me that represents society's obsession with intoxication and it translates as 'brainwashing' in French.

"The Devil Is Innocent" is a song about the social stigma and archaic views that surrounds Addiction. It is also very true for Mental Illness and Sexual Orientation. When I was trying to understand why I couldn't imagine a sober life, I really felt like a Devil, and even those close to me treated me like that. People were were telling me that they couldn't understand why I would continue to make bad choices and that I needed more willpower. I was seeing multiple counsellors that were looking through my life to pinpoint a specific event as the reason for my drinking and I spent 6 weeks in a rehabilitation clinic; partly so I could prove to my employer that I wasn't a bad person. All of this was beneficial to me, but I couldn't remain sober and I was still a Devil in some people's eyes.

The moment of awakening for me was when I saw a Neurologist. I nearly broke down crying when he told me the most liberating of words - "It's not your fault". He went on to explain how my brain was getting itself in a tizz. My wires were crossed, I'd lost the ability to be rational and my brain needed to heal just like my leg did. The need to drink was an obsession and I was powerless against my compulsive behaviour. It was no wonder I would get a rush of adrenaline each time I walked past a bottle shop!

With time I would come to understand that the "Power of Choice ain't Relevant" and I would write the song "The Devil Is Innocent". Addiction, like Mental Illness and Sexual Orientation is not about making poor lifestyle choices or being a bad person. These 'devils' are innocent of the stigma that is branded on them. The guilty parties are actually those who are in positions of authority whose archaic views are spread through the media to fuel trepidation in communities. Unfortunately, we live in a world of convenience junkies who happily consume these 'fear scams'. We need to do a better job of educating ourselves on how we can support each other with compassion and understanding and the first step to do this is to understand that "The Devil Is Innocent".

Keywords: Independent Music, Musicians, Great Music, Independent Music Blog, Music Talks, Tracey Arbon, Indie Music blog, Metal Music, Story

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